God rescues// Happy Birthday Joshua Grady Shave

God rescues//and he brought me Joshua. Happy Birthday, my love.

1998 SMCC when Josh and I met

Today is my sweet sweet love’s birthday. He is 29, strong, healthy, blessed, and wonderful. I wanted to spend today bragging on him and thanking God for blessing me with such a wonderful, loving, selfless, consistent husband.    Seriously.   I do not just spout off these adjectives like I am writing a greeting card. He REALLY is ALL  these things. Over the years I have become more aware of just how considerate he is. So many people, including myself, tend to take advantage of his kindness. At first I thought it just came naturally to him and he didn’t even have to think about it. But realistically, he does. He is the kind of person who makes a daily effort to build others up, to NOT always say what he is thinking, to go out of his way to help you with what you want, to think the best of people, to forgive, to put his plans aside when he knows you want him or need him for something. And all these things are not just for me.  They are for everyone: our families, his co-workers, his friends, my friends…

It is almost bad for other people because I see him sacrificing all the time and it just accentuates how selfish the rest of us are.

I love him for so many reasons, but the first one would have to be that he loves God so much and wants to live his life (our life) to please HIM. This is the most admirable trait in a man. It brings a constant comfort because I know where his priorities lie and I can trust him to LEAD us in the right direction.

I love him because he likes what I like…and even when he doesn’t he sacrifices and compromises.  I love that we can sing and dance and scream out the window in the car together. I love that when he is in front of me at a stop light, he opens his back window and says, I love you.

I love that we can laugh together.

Our 1st Dave Matthews Concert together

I love Josh for all these things and more. He is so strong. So athletic. So funny. So freaking talented at everything he tries; it might be a little sickening, but adorable at the same time.

I did find something I am better at than him……… and that is ice skating. :)

Pathetic for me I know, but seriously. He is good at EVERYTHING. And humble about it too. How lucky am I?

I love him because he makes me coffee in the mornings.

I love him because when I am tired and do not want to wake up and go to work, he walks around the bed, throws my arms around his neck, and walks me into the bathroom.

I love him because he always opens my door.

I love him because I know he prays for me every day.

I love him because when he travels I do not worry about his integrity. (but I pray about it nontheless to keep him strong and holy)

I love him because he thinks it’s cute when I look up new words.

Lol….. like the house we are buying is on Avocet. I didn’t know what that was and I didn’t want to live on a road that meant like “hoochie momma” so I looked it up :)
and this made him smile.

It means a long legged shorebird, by the way. How fitting.

I love that he can make so many people laugh and that he is not afraid to be silly.

I love him because he is passionate about so many things… our love, surfing, basketball, family, snowboarding, his work, his prayer life, God, wakeboarding…

I love him because he is not boring.

I love him because keeps me sane and eases my fears. He reminds me where my focus should be. He holds me accountable and teaches me love.

I love him because I want to. Should all these awesome things fade away. I will love him.

God rescues.

When I looked up his name last night that is what I found.  And its so true; God did rescue me. In the same way he rescued Josh and all of us who allow him to be our Savior. What  wonderful life we live, abiding in him and seeking his face.

Thank you for all of it, God.

And thank you for being a wonderful husband, Josh. I love you. Happy Birthday.



“Times of waiting take us to deeper levels of trust.”

I read that in a book today and feel like that is exactly where I am right now, so I am trying to make that my prayer; that I exercise patience and faith as I wait for God’s answers. I feel like I am surrounded by people that are going through the same thing…waiting that is… for jobs, answers, healing, kemo to end (3 more!!).
Sometimes that is so hard, especially when you think you know what to do or what God wants you to do. Other times it is hard to tell the difference. But I want to be sure and want what is best. And I know that is His plan.

So here I am. Waiting and praying :)

Even if the sky is falling down.


“The very least you can do in your life is to figure out what you hope for…
and the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance, but live right in it, under its roof.  Right now I’m living in that hope, running down its hallway, and touching the walls on both sides.”

~Barbara Kingsolver

The imagery of that made me smile. I know it has been a while, but I thought I’d share :) I am currently on my plan period, so that is all for now.
ave a happy blessed day as you run down the hall of godly love and hope grazing both sizes. :)   Don’t worry, He’ll take care of the fingerprints ;)

You are not alone in your suffering

Sunday morning at church Hannah did an interpretive dance to Cry out to Jesus by Third Day, and it was amazing. Not only is she so beautiful but she did a great job, (I am so proud of her:) and the song and dance together was powerful; it had me in tears by the end of the first stanza. I fought them back the whole time as my ribs shook and my throat burned. It’s hard enough to think about my own pain, let alone all the people around me that are suffering too. I know often I get caught up in my own hurt and forget about the other, possibly bigger things people close to me may be going through. Although we all hurt in very different ways, there is one common thread that can heal and bring us together. He’ll meet you where ever you are.

When your lonely
And it feels like the whole world is falling on you
You just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus
He’ll meet you wherever you are

“Cry Out To Jesus”

To everyone who’s lost someone they love
Long before it was their time
You feel like the days you had were not enough
when you said goodbye

And to all of the people with burdens and pains
Keeping you back from your life
You believe that there’s nothing and there is no one
Who can make it right

There is hope for the helpless
Rest for the weary
Love for the broken heart
There is grace and forgiveness
Mercy and healing
He’ll meet you wherever you are
Cry out to Jesus, Cry out to Jesus

For the marriage that’s struggling just to hang on
They lost all of their faith in love
They’ve done all they can to make it right again
Still it’s not enough

For the ones who can’t break the addictions and chains
You try to give up but you come back again
Just remember that you’re not alone in your shame
And your suffering

When your lonely
And it feels like the whole world is falling on you
You just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus
Cry to Jesus

To the widow who suffers from being alone
Wiping the tears from her eyes
For the children around the world without a home
Say a prayer tonight

wHo aRe YoU?

I am about to go for a run and was reminded of a phrase my dad often says. I spent the weekend with him and the family, so all of his words of wisdom are fresh on my mind. I can remember growing up, they would drive me crazy; now I can’t get enough of them! ( am sure they drive some of my friends crazy though).

“It is not what you do that determines who you are,
It is who you are that determines what you do.”

This put us in responsibility.

If it was the other way around we could always place blame, oh that is just how I am

No, you determine how you act and who you are.

Before you do something ask yourself, does this reflect who I am? Who I want to be? Does this reflect who God has asked me to be? Who he says I am?

We were given the power to choose.

We have to choose what is the most important to us.

God tells us who we are.

Sometimes, it just takes believing it.

The truth will set you free.

This quote comes from dad, but he didn’t make it up. He pulled it from the Neil Anderson’s book Victory Over the Darkness, which deals with way more than i can tall you on here…the battle between flesh and spirit, heart and mind, truth and lies…satan’s accusation vs God’s truth and freedom…so much more…

I recommend it.

It’s the little things

Do you ever have a moment in a normal day when you are doing normal things and all of a sudden something hits you, out of the ordinary, and you take a deep sigh and smile as you think, gaa, life is good.

It happens more than I can account for but most recently it happened Sunday and today.

Today I was walking out to my car headed to work and the wind picked and send my hair and clothes soaring and caused my entire body to step back a little.

I just stopped and smiled. It was as if that burst of wind was a reminder of how good God is to me. How no matter what I can rest in the comfort of knowing He is taking care of me. He loves me and is working for my good whether I always see it or not.

It was breath of fresh air.

And it really just makes me smile.

This week has been great weather so far and it is often underestimated.

God gives us so much that we take for granted. We don’t seem to give Him the time of day until he takes one of them away.

But as the Job says we must praise him for the good and the bad, we must not accuse him of wrongdoing. The Lord gives and takes away. How blessed am I to have been given and trusted with so many things.

Blessed be the name of the Lord.

And praise Him for the breeze!

The new “Christian”

I have decided men (and sometimes women) are using Christianity as a pick up line.

Yes, you heard me right.

Let me say I do have many Christian friends who I know love the Lord so I am not saying this by any means is all men, but from many personal experiences and those of my friends, we have indeed decided “Christianity” is now what some men use to get you to go out with them…

I guess they think that is the easiest way to have you convinced he is a good person. I mean what girl wouldn’t run home and be like, “eeeee! I got a date!! and guess what?!?! He’s a Christian!!!”

(awww *sigh from all the girl friends* what a catch! They think.)

That is until about two or three dates go by and you see what kind of person he really is.

So please, if you are not a God fearing, Jesus worshiping, Abba glorifying man, please do not claim to be one. Just be straight up. Don’t use godliness as a chance to get with a good girl. And girls quit claiming to be followers and “really good Christians” when you are not. Because then men date you and think that’s what a “Christian” looks like.. and they get confused. Especially if you are loose because then they think that’s just what all women (even the Christian ones now) are like. And THIS IS NOT TRUE.


If you are going to be a Christian, be a Christian.

Think, pray, follow, live, act and glorify God with your life.

If you are not, don’t claim to be.

I know we all struggle, stumble, fall and make poor choices; trust me i know. But there is a point when your stumbling becomes a lifestyle and you are no longer striving to me better but accepting your ‘worse’…. This is when i say we all need to reevaluate ourselves before the Lord and see where we stand.

Revelation 3:15
I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth!

Take a hike

I was hiking today with Dad and Aaron and the trail was pretty difficult. It was uphill a lot of the time (or up-rock rather). We were climbing rocks and hopping from one to the other most of the way in and out. It was taking a lot of concentration to say the least and Dad said something about how it was so intense he was concentrating so hard on not tripping he didn’t even have time to day dream.

That’s one thing that is really good about hiking. You can get a lot of thinking done. Even when you are with a person as talkative as me there is still plenty of time to think and reflect.

After dad said that I got to thinking about how much I think… I was actually thinking at that time about lots of stuff despite the hefty incline. I kinda hear that a lot about myself, I think a lot…

Even the other night I was out with friends listening to music and just relaxing outside and I said something I suppose was “deep” for a night out and my friend said something like I was constantly thinking deep and she didn’t know how I did it. She said, “I am just sitting here thinking about what I have to do tomorrow and you are thinking about good and evil and how to better the world or something!”

I admit, I do think about these kinds of things often. How people are being deceived by the world, the devil, their peers…and it saddens me and I want to help them… sometimes it is mind boggling and discouraging. But this is often what I think of. I told my dad she said that and he said that was abnormal this day and age but from the looks of what he could tell about me, I had trained my mind to think about such things. I have been taught since a child to take every thought captive. I try not to dwell on things I deem inappropriate (or God says is) and when they come up I normally exit them out and think about godly things or why I was even thinking that or if I am thinking that what is this other person thinking… lol crazy I know… but then I get back to God and how He is the best for everything… Yes, this takes a lifetime of training… as in I am still training myself daily for sure.

Sometimes I think about how people don’t like to think. I often ask people what they are thinking and get an “I don’t know” or “nothing” or “can’t say” as the answer….

To me that is nearly impossible. But I am not saying it is that way for everyone.

I do think in some circumstances it is a choice. I know many people that cannot drive, clean, eat, exercise or even sleep without noise. People that CANNOT sleep without the TV on!! and many more than that prefer to have it on to help them sleep, claiming, without the TV their thoughts keep them awake.

Well maybe they are keeping us awake for a reason?

Maybe we should think them?

Think them through

Are we afraid of what we are thinking? What we might have to deal with?

Why don’t we just think it, write it down, reflect on it and when possible, solve it?

How long can we suppress these thoughts or feelings and hide them with TV, sounds and “I don’t knows”?

Are we afraid to be alone with our thoughts?

Perhaps Americans insistence on sound is indeed a symptom of our stubborn refusal to think.

I think it is very important to have a time of reflection. Call it what you want: prayer, meditation, blogging, etc… these are all ways to get what has been on your mind today OUT. Get it online, on paper, give it to God in prayer or give it to a friend. Keeping it to your self will never help. It will just stay there… haunting you…

Reflection, writing, planning— all those things can HELP YOU.

Many people lay awake at night planning for tomorrow. Grab a pen and write it down. Then you won’t worry about forgetting and you can add to it when you wake up if you need to. I know that sounds simple but it gets deeper…

If we/you don’t take time to reflect or THINK about your day, your life, your agenda, your goals…

How will you ever improve?

How will you ever solve or let God solve any of your problems?

It seems very important to be able to look at your day and say, “How can I do this better tomorrow?”

How can I be a better person or better to someone, tomorrow?

Think about it

I dare you.